I'm 31 weeks pregnant. Only six more weeks to go!! I think at this point, I just keep asking myself if this is all going to work out? I wonder what April will bring. Will Samuel be okay? Will he survive? Will I?
It's not that I'm trying to be pessimistic, it's just so hard to let go and not let my mind get the best of me. I start going through the scenarios of women who lost subsequent NAIT pregnancies in the last trimester, and I start wondering if the same thing will happen to me. It's horrible to think about all of that, but difficult to not think about it.
On a brighter note, I am nesting very hard these days!! Spring cleaning has started!! I'm having diaper showers at school and one that my friends are hosting!! I'm very excited! Cleaning and preparing gives me something to focus on instead of worrying about Samuel's counts. This really isn't easy. It's only getting harder for me.
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Girl - I had no idea what you have been up to lately. My...it's been like a civil war within yourself, huh?
ReplyDeleteI hope you don't mind but I'm adding you and your baby to our prayer list.
My kids and I pray for certain people every week. You just got top spot!
I had all high risk pregnancies and can understand some of the hard days. I had to remind myself - that no matter what, the life inside of me was truly eternal.
(Besides - in our family - there seems to be some stubbornness in it - so use it for good! Keep fighting the good fight and be encouraged!)
Blessings to you!!! :)
praying for you sweetie...hang in there. It will all be worth it. Cya soon.
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